Just call me Hoover

Because I suck. Seriously. I haven't blogged since like October of last year. And obviously no blogging means no concentrated efforts on getting in shape either.... Well, at least one that isn't round. And you can also call me Hoover because, especially lately, I've been sucking in everything I could find, especially if it's processed, sugar, caffeine, alcohol or fried.

Part of the reason I've slacked off is because I've been too busy being in love. Like "head-over-heels-can't-think-about-anything-but-him-luckiest-girl-in-the-world-i-can't-believe-i've-found-him-and-he-loves-me-just-the-way-i-am-and-it's-amazing-wish-he-would-get-off-work-so-i-can-see-him-because-i-miss-him-and-it's-only-been-a-few-hours" kind of love. It's quite a long story and maybe I'll get into it more later when I have more time, but to make it short, we work at the same place, we had lunch where we talked about facebook, which turned into chatting on facebook, which turned into texting, which turned into drinks, which turned into living together two months later which turned into the absolute LAST thing I ever expected. We'll call him "Adidas" because of the way he "sneakered" his way into my heart. So cheesy, but so true.

Anyway, Adidas and I are at the point where we're comfortable with each other, so we've both put on the "honeymoon 15" if you will. I also recently got promoted so I went from being a server running around everywhere to having a desk job. Granted, I'm not next to the Heaven Box, I mean bread cart, every shift so my calorie intake has been reduced. It's just not reduced enough, especially since my alcohol intake has increased. What can I say? We LOVE bubbly!!

You're probably asking yourself, "Why in the HELL did she get on here? To rub it in my face that she's fat and happy?"

No. That's not my intention. All of this happiness has actually affected my health. I had my gallbladder out ten years ago and since I'm not moving around as much, some of the consequences are starting to become more prevalent in my digestive system, mainly in the form of IBS. It's not pretty. I literally had to go home from work one day last week because I had a gastrointestinal emergency so severe that I didn't QUITE make it ALL the way on the commode and... well... let's just say I had to go home to take another shower and change then come back to work. Embarrassed, party of one? Your table is now available, please!

So, in an effort to get my digestive track (and hourglass figure) back in shape, Adidas and I are on a mission. I got a one night stay at a local hotel and we're using it as a reward for our hard work. Anyone who's ever played me in Scrabble (or any game really....) knows that I LOVE to win. So, Adidas and I are having a competition. We're writing down our current weight and measurements and placing them along with our goals in an envelope. When we have our night at the hotel in a month or so, we're going to open it up and see who either met or exceeded their goals. Whoever "did better" has the upper hand for the evening, if you catch my drift.

I'm really kind of in love with that stiletto workout (especially because I can't wear heels for SHIT) so I may try some of those moves since I don't have a midget handy.....